THE VALUE OF A FRIEND

Who needs friends anyway?” we shout as our best friend stomps away angrily.  As if that isn’t bad enough, we decide to add, “You’re a big baby.”

We all need friends.  We need to know what a friend is and who can be a friend.  We need to be a friend.

Who needs friends?  We do!  A story is told of a new baby who had to stay in the hospital for three months.  This baby didn’t know or feel the love of her parents.  She was twenty-three years old before she believed that they loved her.  Even a baby of three months needs friends and love.

A child leaves home for his first day of school afraid of the unknown, wondering who will be in his class.  That first day determines whether there will be enough friends to go around.  It is a shame that we cannot learn to be a friend to everyone.

What is a friend?  A friend is someone who likes what you are.  He or she knows your good side and your bad side.  This friend loves you regardless of your moods.

A friend is someone who gives a soft and gentle answer.  He or she are patient when we are acting ugly and grumpy.  Proverbs 15:1 says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Why do we answer an angry friend with anger?  Is it because we are defending ourselves?  Do we protect ourselves against angry words by returning such words?  If we could remember the Golden Rule and “Do unto others as we would have them do unto us,” we would have many more friends.

Who can be a friend?  Everyone can.  We tend to become what our classmates or peers think we are.  If we are constantly told that we are dumb, ugly or unkind, that is what we will think we are.

There was a student who was kind and gentle.  He worked very hard in school and got good grades.  But he had two problems.  He didn’t have a lot of money and he was adopted.  The other students called him names and laughed at him.  This child took on a defensive attitude, became angry and then would not play with anyone.  Stop!  Think!  Would you want to be this child?  Would you want to be treated as he was?

Who can be a friend?  You can!  Be a friend to everyone---to the rich, to the poor, to the “A” student and to the child who is struggling for a “D”.  Be kind to each and every one.  You will be a better person because of it and you will help others to become better people.

A good example of friendship was David and Jonathan.  Jonathan was the prince, the next king of Israel.  David was God’s choice to be the next king.  Jonathan knew that David was going to have his job, but he loved David so much he did all that he could to help David.  Jonathan showed us the value as well as the price of true friendship.

We all can be friends by treating others as we would like to be treated, by being kind and not getting angry and defensive.  Give yourself a beautiful gift…..give yourself a friend!

(Written by Drusilla Peterson Dye August 1991)